Sunday, July 25, 2004

For the longest time I've been living in an area that lacks description. It's neither here nor there and though sometimes it's the most comfortable place in the world being a place of rest one should follow the general rule of not staying there more than one ought to. One runs the peril of being average if he or she does so. They who stay absorb the character of the place themselves leaving no sense of individuality and no better than a pack of lemmings running with no goal nor direction in mind. Blind following blind, dictating upon themselves their own sense of what's right and what's wrong. Changing the landscape to suit the mood of the moment but in reality those changes were only in their fevered minds. Mistakes were covered with more mistakes and they called it good. Morals slowly moved its polarity shifting from right to left. Everyone applauded everyone and they patted each other on the back. This is the world I've been living in no matter how much I denied it. I dare not participate in their exercises nor did I lift a finger to speak what it is in my mind. At best I am a fence sitter. Like an orchestra slowly building in crescendo the voice of God constantly calls me to step down and continue the race I left behind. He calls me every time. Unrelenting in His pursuit. Uncompromising in His ways yet gentle enough to drive all fears away. Bringing light to show me the nothingness that I intently observed. But I've been staring at nothing for so long I found it hard to turn away. "Train my ears to your voice," I pleaded in shame whenever my guilty conscience finds me. God still chooses to ever so gently whispers that at times the background cacophony of chaos threatened to drown it out like a siren calls men to their death. With ever increasing patience, God still calls and I hear its sweet sweet symphony stirring a longing I have long forgotten. Mayhap tis' now time I heeded the call, took His hand and ran away from this place called forgetful.

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