Saturday, March 12, 2005

I chanced on an article on bullying earlier today and as much as I would make fun of those incidents in my past, laughing at it, or generally overlook it I can't deny that most of those wounds I received from those times still haven't healed properly. The way I see it right now the popular adage, "Someday you will look back on all these and laugh" doesn't apply to everything. Some things need to be mourned and corrected before you could move on with your life. Because otherwise you would be denying these didn't have any effect on your fears and and traumas you have right now as an adult. I'm sure most of us have these unpleasant experiences (which is really an understatement in some cases) when we were still in school but have later learned to close this chapter and move on with their lives but there are those who still carry around with them in their thoughts scars that are opened anew with the reminder of taunts and bodily harm. Should I not dare to bring this up? Should I relegate these thoughts down to the depths and pretend that they didn't happen?

In our school there's a sort of hierarchy among the bullies: the topmost part was occupied by the real bullies. There's no middle ground with these guys, you either cooperate with them or they make your days in school a living hell. The second tier was occupied by their hangers on. These were the ones who go with the top dogs in hopes that they would be eventually accepted as equals and as a means of status quo. The third tier was occupied by those who think they're bullies in their own right. They went about with their own groups and stayed away from crossing the paths of the first and second rate bullies. The fourth and last set of bullies are those who were being bullied and in turn are bullying those who wouldn't lift a finger against them. In contrast with the uppermost crust, the last level bullies outnumber the top dogs one to three but they can never or will they ever stand up to those bullying them. I was a quiet kid. I was one of those who tend to blend in the background in hopes of not being caught in the crossfire. I don't bother them, they won't bother me. At least that's what I what thought. Kids can be very nasty for no apparent reason. It could be because they don't like the way they look, the way you act, or just because it makes them feel good about themselves. Parents or teachers would then probably try to excuse these saying it was all innocent fun and they don't know any better. In my case it was a barrage of name calling. Innocent fun? I had a few experiences where they also tried to take my recess and lunch. But it was all the teasing that stayed with me all throughout. Whoever said, "Sticks and stone may break my bones, but words can never hurt me," was never bullied -- or has a very short memory.

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?